I'm currently stifling the laughter and cringing embarrassment provided courtesy of England's moral pillar, the Daily Mail.
'One went to the most exclusive public school in the land, the other was expelled from four schools in as many years.
So common ground between the two 24-year-olds Prince Harry and Dizzee Rascal was always going to be hard to find.
Unfortunately, the prince's attempts to bridge the divide ended in toe-curling embarrassment - and the danger of being punched by the rap star.'
Don't talk to me about karate - might see in the party drinking champagne dressed as a Nazi
If the substandard, unoriginal and cliche opening wasn't enough, the paper's Middle England cohort have assumed some sort of crusade that, painfully for them, doesn't exist.
'Colleen' only received a mere 34 votes for her invaluable time with this witty gem:
Ha ha,guess what Dizzee,you wouldn't have dared,big talk,pathetic.
Steve Goodwin, the conscience of Leeds, seems to be flag-bearer in the readers' cyber-assault, chirping up with:
So Dizzee's immediate response to something he didn't like would have been violence. Well there's a surprise.
Thanks for your input, Steve.
Unfortunately I don't think any of these are tongue in cheek, but Dizzee's fourth album is. Due for release on September 21st, the good folks at Drowned in Sound have enjoyed a cursory listen already. Read their thoughts here.
Your tracklist looks like this:
2) Road Rage
3) Dance Wiv Me
4) Freaky Freaky
5) Can't Tek No More
6) Chillin' Wiv Da Man Dem
7) Dirtee Cash
8) Money Money Money
The bonus track is reported to be Bad Behaviour, with Tiësto. Dizzee is ever branching his wings but there seems to be some continiuity from 'Maths + English' - there's another collaboration with Shy FX on Can't Tek No More and more than a nod to Old Skool on Road Rage. And anything that pays homage to Adventures of Stevie V's Dirty Cash is a winner.
But still, for the first time in my life I'm a bit unsure about buying a Dizzee album. What are you lot doing?